I like to drink beer for breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, snacks and special treats. Why don’t I look like Keith Richards, you ask? I still look good because I am young, I have a pact with the devil and I am genetically blessed. But please don’t look me up when I’m 40.
Anyway, I digress. I was asked to write an article for this blog, and because my life revolves around beer, there really was no better option for a topic.
Herewith my personal review of all the bars on and around campus.
The Whitehouse
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Since the temporary but heartbreaking closure of the Roundhouse (RIP), The Whitehouse has become the go-to place for drinks on campus. Hopefully craft beer is your thing, because The Whitehouse has a great selection, as well as cocktails and wines, with different specials on each night of the week.
Most importantly, it has happy hour everyday, for all of you who like to forget about your day of academic misfires with a cold beer. Or just skip a potentially disappointing class and spend your whole day here!! I’m not advocating day drinking, I’m just saying it’s awesome for some people, mostly awesome people.
However, it’s also worth mentioning that it’s substantially smaller than the Roundhouse, and it’s easy to miss securing a table either inside or outside. But they also have an upstairs area that they sometimes open, which is the best part of the place. Grab a lot of drinks and get their in-house set of Cards Against Humanity before anybody else does, and you’re guaranteed a great time.
Coco Cubano
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
If cocktails and lots of Cuban memorabilia are your thing, then Coco Cubano is your place. Also, if you’re Latin American and have a seedy upper lip moustache, then this is also your place. While it might not boast the most diverse menu on campus, it definitely has a certain charm and appeal, given you’re in the right mood or with the right company.
Coco Cubano is also right next to Max Brenner so if you have a horrible chocolate date, because apparently that’s a thing, and desperately need to forget your romantic struggles, you can seek the refuge of Coco Cubano. Just remember to tip, because Communism and stuff.
The Doncaster
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Just down the road from campus lies a huge, hidden gem in the UNSW drinking academy.
The Doncaster, or “The Don”, as it’s known by it’s patrons (me, mostly) is an always quiet, always peaceful place to go for a beer during the break, or even during the semester. And I say beer, because make no mistake, this is a beer place. Any orders for cocktails or Rose will probably get you a lot of weird looks from the regulars. If this happens, go to the pokies and immediately deposit a reasonable sum into a machine to re-earn you the grace of these regulars.
It also has a restaurant upstairs, for those who feel like attempting to cook their own steak after a few cold ones, and a mostly vacant eating/smoking area (depending on the time of day) that will give you (and your friends?) privacy and relatively cheap brews for a few hours.
The Roundhouse
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Yes, it’s closed now, but I’m in denial, and it will be OPEN AGAIN SOON so it had to be here. The Roundhouse is as essential to student life as the Basser Steps. I’ve made most of my friends at this place, even gotten jobs from people I met at this place. And the end of semester parties here are the sort of affair that is usually reserved for ‘American Pie’ films and the such. It’s got a great selection of drinks, a fairly decent kitchen, and friendly staff. Simply, it’s the place to go for a good drink at UNSW. Also please come back, because I’m not dealing.
Dishonourable Mention: The Regent Hotel (aka The Rege)
The Rege is a perfectly fine candidate for a drink; however, it is also the site for kick-ons and afterparties after every Roundhouse party. As such, the behaviour I have seen at this place precludes it from being with the rest of the bars on this list. However, If you can make it here at a normal time on a night that doesn’t coincide with a Roundhouse party, you’ll find it’s a simple, straight forward pub, with the small group of regulars to make you just the right amount of awkward and uncomfortable. But yeah, dishonourable mention, because who has a foam party after a previous foam party?!
Honourable Mention: Guzman Y Gomez
I’ll be honest: if you’re desperate enough, order food (kid’s nachos are the cheapest) and get a Corona to satisfy your urges, you monster.
By Adrian Pedic